A Letter to My Last-Year Self

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Dear Amy,

You are on the precipice of greatness.

There you sit, 292 pounds of sass, contemplating your next move.  You know big changes are afoot, but trust me when I tell you that you have no idea how big. In the next year, you’re going to experience some amazing highs, but also some major lows. You’re going to become intimately familiar with the feelings of worry and self-doubt. You’re going to spend many sleepless nights wondering where this crazy roller coaster  is going to take you and whether the on-ride picture is going to be worth purchasing at the end.

It’s worth it–trust me on this one.

You aren’t going to believe me when I say it, but it’s true. In one year, you’re going to lose 70 pounds, but you’re going to gain so much more. You’re going to gain whole new levels of self respect, determination, and confidence. You’re going to amaze your friends and family, who are going to sing your praises. They’re going to tell you countless times how amazing you look. They’re going to be more supportive than you ever could have hoped or dreamed. They’re going to build you up every step of the way.

You’re going to have a friendly competition with your father over who weighs less. You’re going to hear your mother tell you how you’ve surprised her with your ability to stick to your diet plan and continue to shed the pounds week after week. You’re going to shock your sister by bringing her a pair of pants that are just too big to take in. You’re going to hear your husband lament the fact that your ass is getting smaller one minute, then turn around and marvel about his ability to actually feel your hip bones the next. You’re going to relish telling people how much you weigh because they’re going to be so happy for you. You’re going to have to say goodbye to some favorite outfits, but you’re going to find a whole new sense of style that’s been hiding beneath layers of fat and self-consciousness.

But most importantly, you’re going to amaze yourself. You’re going to wake up one morning, realize you haven’t weighed yourself in a while, and find that you dropped 15 pounds in two weeks without even trying. You’re going to be excited about protein powder and protein bars. You’re going to fall into the routine of eating leftovers–and actually enjoying them! You’re going to live a life without bread and pasta, and you know what? You’re going to realize that you don’t miss them all that much (and you can totally have a Junior turkey hoagie from Wawa once in a while, since you won’t be able to eat the whole thing anyway). You’re going to run out of pants that fit, but you know what? You’re going to be ecstatic about it.

2015 is going to be the year that everything changes. You’re going to become determined, you’re going to become healthy, and most importantly, you’re going to become happy.

Keep your chin up, sunshine–you’re getting brighter and brighter every day.

Love always,

Amy

 

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